ALERT!
The underwriter is back, y'all. He's sent word through his middle man, and he actually does want our first born child. I'm kidding, of course. Sort of.
Seems like the underwriter is dissatisfied with our reason for purchasing the Urban Farmhouse. I didn't realize that the new rule changes in mortgage underwriting included writing a 5 point dissertation on your motivation for seeking the new mortgage. I've been out of college for... a while. I'm not telling how many years it's been. I don't even know if I remember how to write a research paper. It will expose my weaknesses if I have to consult the teenagers. Send help.
The Big Red Flag to the underwriter is the fact that our current residence is 1000 sq. ft. larger than the Urban Farmhouse. And who in their right mind would ever want to DOWNSIZE?! Heresy! The audacity of us! Everything should be Bigger! Better! More mortgage! Smart financial decisions be damned! Seems counterproductive to their thorough scrutiny of our financial ability to pay said mortgage.
So yes, we actually have to provide, in writing, more information on our reasons for moving out of our castle and into a shoebox. In writing, y'all. Am I wrong for thinking he just wants a handwriting sample for some nefarious reason? He's totally building a homeland security file on us, and this is just one more piece for his evil little puzzle. I'm sure he's already gotten a DNA sample without our knowledge. I kid, but it does seem like he is really questioning just what plot we have in motion with this house purchase. I hope he lets us know when he figures it out, because idk what it could possibly be.
So I've submitted my statement on our reasons for wanting a smaller house. "Dear Underwriter, Our kids are starting to go to college, and we want to make sure they can't move back in with us in the future." Or something like that. That's the one that I thought he'd like the most.
I should have just sent a link to this blog.
Seems like the underwriter is dissatisfied with our reason for purchasing the Urban Farmhouse. I didn't realize that the new rule changes in mortgage underwriting included writing a 5 point dissertation on your motivation for seeking the new mortgage. I've been out of college for... a while. I'm not telling how many years it's been. I don't even know if I remember how to write a research paper. It will expose my weaknesses if I have to consult the teenagers. Send help.
The Big Red Flag to the underwriter is the fact that our current residence is 1000 sq. ft. larger than the Urban Farmhouse. And who in their right mind would ever want to DOWNSIZE?! Heresy! The audacity of us! Everything should be Bigger! Better! More mortgage! Smart financial decisions be damned! Seems counterproductive to their thorough scrutiny of our financial ability to pay said mortgage.
So yes, we actually have to provide, in writing, more information on our reasons for moving out of our castle and into a shoebox. In writing, y'all. Am I wrong for thinking he just wants a handwriting sample for some nefarious reason? He's totally building a homeland security file on us, and this is just one more piece for his evil little puzzle. I'm sure he's already gotten a DNA sample without our knowledge. I kid, but it does seem like he is really questioning just what plot we have in motion with this house purchase. I hope he lets us know when he figures it out, because idk what it could possibly be.
So I've submitted my statement on our reasons for wanting a smaller house. "Dear Underwriter, Our kids are starting to go to college, and we want to make sure they can't move back in with us in the future." Or something like that. That's the one that I thought he'd like the most.
I should have just sent a link to this blog.
Is it too late to send a revision? I mean, I realize I'm the one showing up late to this party, but Cin... seriously... I don't know if he will buy that reason. I work with a number of people with kids older than mine (who are older than yours), and they do not, I repeat, DO NOT understand the kind of logic you are using!
ReplyDelete